Grey hair is not always for the elderly. It can strikes when you are least expecting it, even at the tender age of 28 as happened to a friend of mine, who hadn’t a care in the World. So what does it mean to go grey – the ‘grey hair’ fallacy of worry and aging certainly doesn’t always add up.
It is a fact that 50 percent of us have grey hair at the age of 50, but it is not the only culprit. Redheads go grey first followed by Caucasians – and vitamin deficiency is a regular cause. Smoking is also a major player, and so a healthy diet and lifestyle is certainly recommended to prevent the early onset of grey hair.
Many of us chose to celebrate the arrival of grey hair and proffer a salt and pepper image. Others strive to eradicate the loss of their original colour and regain it with the many hair products and shades on offer in the High Street or in your local Hair Salon.
Some prolific celebrities are donning the red carpet these days with their shades of grey, and I mean their natural hair. Jamie Lee Curtis, Helen Mirren, Carole King and Glenn Close are just a few of the super famous who have opted to stay grey.
But if you are determined to eliminate, it is a skill in itself to cover the regrowth of grey hair, matching it against your own regular colour roots, and can sometimes need a bit of careful planning in the hairdressing department to achieve a natural look.
Constant Saloon visits can be costly, and so there are some tips to try at home for in between visits, or to replace them.
Grey hair is especially vulnerable to hair dyes – so ammonia-free products are the best formulas.
The new Umberto Beverly Hills U Colour and Revlon ColorSilk. Herbatint Permanent Herbal Haircolour Gel is a very good option. When you wash, use a gentle, moisturizing shampoo to help limit fading, go for a product like Aveeno Active Naturals Nourish + Moisturize Shampoo.
L’Oreal EverPure Moisture Leave-in Conditioner is also a good option to preserve the colour. All can be ordered online or in selected hair salons and outlets. You can also do your own research to see what works best for you.
It is all about ongoing maintenance and if you get the products and the shades right, the grey will take care of itself.
It may seem these two disparate concepts are hardly related, but they often go hand in hand.
Many of us are labelled at birth by our parents, as the ‘clever’ one or the ‘creative’ one or even the ‘hopeless’ child, which is merely based on how they want us to live their lives.
I had a phone call last year from a close friend, distraught after her elderly Mother had thrown out some of her favourite clothes and childhood possessions. Marianne had recently moved back in to look after her since her Mother’s physical and mental health had deteriorated, but had taken a short break away from the daily grind of being a constant carer.
On her return she had found her wardrobe and chest of drawers invaded, with half of the contents given away to charity. My friend who already suffers from anxiety and self-doubt, was thrown into a major frenzy – and it took her several days to return to any sort of normality, blaming herself for abandoning her Mother.
This was however, the turning point for Marianne, who realised after several months of counselling that it was in fact her Mother’s way of getting Marianne to carry the rage and anxiety she had been feeling herself prior to her outburst.
Added to this Marianne had always been told that out of all of her siblings, she was the one who was the major disappointment, and would never make anything of her life. On the contrary, she has been a high achiever, even more so than her two sisters, but who constantly seeks her Mother’s approval, which is never recognised in spite of her major accolades in her successful career in the City.
How many times do you hear in a marriage or relationship breakup, that the man or woman has to leave because his partner is ‘crazy’. This always sits uncomfortably with me, because you can bet that they will go on to meet someone else and evoke the same pattern of behaviour in their new relationship.
Therapists and psycho analysts call this ‘projection’ as they are in fact again getting their partners to carry their anxiety or feelings of hopelessness so that they don’t have to.
If this is hard to digest, let me give you a very simple example of how it works and how toxic this type of ‘projection’ can be. A close friend who is also an exceptional therapist had a new client several years ago who was suffering from depression, so badly that he wanted to end his life. My therapist friend David spent the entire session baffled by his account of what had happened since his wife’s departure, and at the end of the session told her he felt he was carrying his partner’s feelings of desperation. He left feeling a lot happier.
Two hours later his estranged wife called him saying she was feeling suicidal and wanted to give the relationship another go! He thankfully declined, and as far as I know, has remained anxiety free ever since.
I hope this may be helpful to those of you who are suffering with anxiety and depression, because if you look closely, you may find some of it may not even be yours to carry.
If you or anyone you know are struggling please check out the following websites for
help or just for someone to talk to
If you are an animal lover, as most of us are, an utterly compelling and heartfelt documentary ‘Flying Fur’ tells the story of a courageous and dedicated guy who has set up a rescue mission in The States, entirely self-funded, to rescue dogs and cats who are fated to be ‘put down’ due to an injury or homelessness.
Paul is the founder, pilot, scheduler, social media, accounting, web design, and fur parent. Paul is a U.S. Army veteran, and currently a network engineer by day, specializing in Cisco collaboration technologies, including VOIP, route/switch, and security. In his spare time he enjoys cooking and classic autos.
TESSA THE DOG
Tessa is Paul’s rescue pup, and the inspiration for the founding of the organization. Her day job includes sleeping, eating, barking at random delivery people, and general doggy shenanigans. She enjoys playing, long walks on the trail, chewing on stuff, and licking people.
This compelling and beautifully shot film tracks Paul on one of his missions, as he flies off in his single engine plane across mid America, in often treacherous weather conditions, to deliver his animal Pawsengers to either their new home or an animal hospital designated to take them in.
When this film was aired in the UK there was not a dry eye in the house and Paul himself was in attendance and the questions ranged from a proposal marriage (to Paul!) and how we could get involved in this wonderful organisation.
Paul came across as a humble self-motivated man, whose love and passion for the furry kind had compelled him to set up this unique rescue mission.
It portrayed beauty and kindness in this dark age of violence and devastation, and gives us a glimpse of hope in humankind and a reminder that we share the glorious planet with other living beings, who sometimes need our help and whose love is unconditional as they give back in so many ways.
I hope this may inspire you to find a way of becoming involved in one of your local dog or cat rescue centres, or even set up your own animal National Rescue campaign.